Aloha

Today was THE LAST DAY of our beautiful, relaxing summer. Jeff goes back to work tomorrow. I'm dreading it! I find that I nearly always balk at big changes. I've been a "worrier" my whole life--some of my earliest memories are of worrying. It's probably a legitimate but mild case of anxiety. Starting school each year as a child (and later) was always a major exercise in anxiety control. And I simply dread going visiting teaching. I worry about the next primary girls activity day I have to plan. I even feel distressed when I have to call some non-mom/sister person and talk on the phone! If I see someone I know at the store, I have to fight the impulse to hide and avoid social interaction. Lots of times I hide anyways, and it's never because I don't like the person! It's because I don't like having unexpected small talk foisted upon me. Social stress! Introvert plus anxiety equal I think I'll be a hermit. Spain is actually selling entire abandoned 15th century hamlets for the price of a modest American home right now--that possibility is definitely on my list of retirement options. Thank goodness my husband is on the same social page as me, even if he doesn't worry as effectively as I do. Thankfully I can usually keep my tendency to worry under control with lots of willpower and rational thoughts. But it is always lurking, waiting to pounce upon me when my defenses next go down. 

Believe it or not, this post is not meant to be about my annoying anxiety. It's about beginnings and endings. Summer break is ending. NOW. Sniff!

In the previous three summers of Jeff's employment as a teacher, I have braced myself for summer's end throughout the vacation. I was unwilling to let myself get completely used to such a life of ease with my husband home 24/7, only to have it end. This summer I gave myself over entirely to the convenience and joy of having my whole family home full time--quite the feat considering my tendency to anxiety. I didn't dread the bliss of summer ending until this week. I simply enjoyed the low-key relaxing time we spent together this summer. Jeff and I perfected the art of "tag-team parenting", as I like to call it. Each morning we took turns running and watching the kids. If one of us had to go to the store, the other one stayed home with the kids. We did family trips and walks. We did projects at home. It was a peaceful, restful, HAPPY summer. 

When change comes I tend to "wax philosophical", as my dad likes to say. This week at the end of our summery bliss, I've been thinking about how an ending is also a beginning. When one thing ends, something else always begins. It reminds me of the word "aloha." Doesn't "aloha" mean hello and goodbye? Those Hawaiians have it right! Aloha is really quite a profound word. With aloha we say goodbye to one person/place/phase while simultaneously greeting the next. Instead of mourning the loss of what's gone, aloha looks ahead to what's beginning. I love that idea! I want to acknowledge an ending and welcome a beginning all in one breath. Aloha!

Ow.

Playing Scrabble Junior with Spencer. 

Jay lost his two front teeth this month! He wiggled them until they literally fell out of his mouth.

Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate

Little miss personality

My reading buddy.

She bit her lip falling down the stairs. Poor little vampire baby!

Pretending we're on a date, when we're really laying sideways across a mountain of clean laundry.

 

I can't decide what I like better during family scripture time: listening to Jay read a verse from the Book of Mormon or watching Jeff's face while Jay reads! That fatherly amusement and pride is great. Jay is also learning how to ride his bike without training wheels.

 ROSE! She mopped the bathroom floor for me this week--with hand sanitizer and her white bath towel. 

I love their faces.

We played tag on the trampoline and Amber was "it" once. It was a little bit dangerous, but a whole lot of fun and thankfully nobody broke any bones this time.

 I'm looking forward to spending more quality time with these two girls this school year. 

Till we meet again next year, beautiful blissful summer.

Aloha, school year!

ALOHA!

Two visits

Summer is waning, but we have still squeezed in two fun visits this month! Last week (August 10th) my grandparents came to visit us for an afternoon. They were on a big road trip and swung by our house to visit us. It was so good to see them again! I loved talking with my sweet Grama and watching her and Grampa talk with their great-grandkids. The next morning, I met Grama and Grampa at the Columbia River Temple and we did a session together, with family names that Grampa brought. It was: 1. the first time I've ever done temple work for a family name, and 2. the first time I've been to the temple with my grandparents since the day I was married. Double the goodness!

With three of their eight great grandkids.

Grampa's first selfie. :)

The next day (on August 12th) we drove up near Seattle to visit my mom and sister Mel for the weekend. We had a long list of back-to-school/fall shopping to do while we were there, but we also went to explore the tide pools along the Puget Sound. Of course my mom cooked us amazing food and took us to Chick Fil A while we were there, and we left feeling so full on Monday afternoon that we didn't want dinner when we got home! Jeff and I also relished several trail runs among the lush (in spite of the drought) greenery while we were there. The kids relished time with their Grama and Aunt Mel (and so did I). We sure love living less than 3 hours away from Grama Meri's house.

 Happy little traveler...as long as she had someone to talk to.

Nike Outlet!! The neon shoes!!

Alki Beach Park tide pools:

Baby in a bonnet in a basket at the beach: the best.

A crab! It was dead. 

It was rough, slippery going on all those barnacle covered wet seaweed-coated rocks. 

We didn't have any extra clothes with us, so we did our best to keep the kids from falling into the cold ocean. 

Awesome anemone!

Amber's first tide pool. She said "no big deal, guys. I do wet and slimy allll the time."

Touching a rough purple sea star. I let Amber touch it with her foot too.

The sea stars look so fat and squishy, but they were hard and rough!

poke.

It looks kind of gross, but that green stuff is just seaweed, not algae. There was such a cool fresh briny breeze there.

Amber wanted Rose's hair bow.

This guy was acting far too regal for his status as a lowly seagull. 

Grama Meri and Jay exploring afar.

After the tide pools, we took our wet sandy feet to lunch at the Husky Deli for sandwiches and ice cream. Delicious! The Pacific Northwest coast is one of my favorites.

Playing around at the house:

 

Sunday morning hair salon.

We did our share of errands, and that meant messing up the baby's routine. Amber was quite happy to eat/slime her banana in the car one day.

Ho hum, Target.

All tuckered out at Grama's house.

We built Amber a barricade in the corner for a crib. 

It wouldn't be Grama Meri's house without STORY TIME.

One of my favorite places to take pictures of my kids is on the porch at my parents' house, so I did a 5 minute photo-shoot while we were there:

"Kiss the baby"

Love

We love you, Grama Meri!

Pondering poverty

Over the past few weeks I have been thinking about poverty: what is it really?

When the statements started rolling in for Rose's tonsillectomy and Jay's broken arm, one of the bigger bills included a phone number to call about a low-income discount for medical expenses. I thought it couldn't hurt to ask, so I called in. The lady listed the things I had to do to apply for the charitable assistance program. One of the steps was to apply for health insurance through the state to eliminate/identify that as a payment possibility. So I went through the arduous complicated online application and was surprised to find at the end that our kids DID qualify for Washington state medical coverage. Say what? I was under the impression that anyone who had access to employer-provided medical insurance wasn't eligible for state insurance. It turns out that there is also a sliding income scale, and according to the government, we are below the national poverty line?

I've been mulling over the idea of a poverty line ever since. On one hand I feel somewhat betrayed that the government pays teachers so low that a teacher with any kind of family is below the poverty line. On the other hand, I look at our house and situation and feel incredibly blessed that THIS is considered poverty in our country!

I mean, wow: a big air conditioned house with comfy beds and furniture, TV and computers, sinks and toilets, internet and books, not to mention a stocked pantry and full fridge. THIS is below the poverty line?

Last year Jay's school sent home a questionnaire so they could determine who qualified for free school lunches. Every child gets free lunch in our school district regardless, but they still like to collect the official data. We were surprised to discover that Jay qualified for free school lunch!

Ambushed again by that sneaky poverty line!

When I think of poverty, I think of mud, cardboard, hunger, and Africa. Not my comfortable home with health, hygiene, and security!

I don't feel poor. By so many standards we are nowhere near poor. I don't think I've ever really felt the true sting of poverty. Yes we have a wonderful supporting family that has helped us time and again. Yes, we have had some lean mean times, living on substitute teaching and WIC. It took some seriously clever budgeting to squeak by back then. Actually, what am I saying? It still takes some seriously clever budgeting today! But we aren't living in POVERTY! We have always had a roof over our heads and enough food to eat. Oh, and plenty of clothing.

Maybe what this all boils down to is semantics and word connotations. To me, the word poverty means having difficulty providing the necessities of life (like food, clothes, shelter, and medical services). But our government uses the word "poverty" much more casually. I'm not saying that there aren't truly impoverished people in this country; I'm just saying that it seems that almost out of respect for the truly impoverished (aka the starving and homeless) we should think up a different word for those who live comfortably on a small income. Provident living? Budget-ninja? Hmm.

We count it as an enormous blessing that we have always been able to live off of one modest income and I have always been able to stay home with our kids.

To conclude the insurance saga (for now, that is--when it comes to insurance, there's always something I don't know), as of last month we now have the kids on state health insurance, which is 100% coverage, and we don't have to pay any of those big bills from the tonsils and cast. HUGE BLESSING? YES!

Since I'm on the topic, here are my top five tried-and-true methods to living well on a small income:
1. Always pay tithing. The Lord ALWAYS does his part and more. This is why we've always had enough, even in lean times. I know it.
2. Make it work with what you've got. There's almost always a solution or fix that doesn't cost money! Patch it, build it, rig it, and then save up for something better if needed.
3. Save all nonessential purchases for the end of the month. This is my favorite budgeting trick. I try my best to keep a running list of every nonessential item we're tempted to buy throughout the month. By the end of the month, it's amazing how many of those things get crossed off the list! We buy what we can off the list with the money that's still left in the budget. Of course we have to bend this rule to fit various situations, but we try to follow it mostly.
4. I don't do impulse buys. I keep a list of "long term" items to purchase someday , so that if I happen to come across the perfect thing on sale, I know that it was already in the plan to get it. It's all about self control! I'm not perfect, but I do my best to stick to these ideals.
5. Make a meal plan. It works and saves so much. I do a monthly meal plan spreadsheet with a list of everything we need for all the meals. Then I estimate the cost of our food for the month and adjust the meals as necessary to stay within the budget.

Two months ago, I finished reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory to Jay and Rose. Just this past week, Jay was asking me probing questions about why Charlie Bucket's family didn't have any food or money. In the book, they ate cabbage soup twice a day and they were starving. I explained it in at least 10 different ways, but Jay simply didn't understand why they didn't "just save their money" to buy more food. I don't know if this means we're doing a bad job or a good job of teaching our kids about money--ha ha.

Jeff and I always laugh when we are labeled by yet another form/questionnaire as "poor." We don't feel POOR! We feel RICHLY blessed. 

How could we not?