Life Wall

 Ultra busy weeks are exhausting and crazy, but the true test comes the week after, when we have to keep going and doing and being, with less fuel in the tank and less sleep in the bank. And even though this week wasn't quite as busy as last week, it was still very full. I hit a "life wall" this week, wherein I could only hold one or two of the balls at a time in my juggling act of housework, yardwork, personal work, coaching work, and family work. 

During coaching seasons I am extremely organized at home so I can have the freedom and peace of mind to be away during afternoon/evening coaching hours. I make detailed meal plans and cook dinner in the morning. As much as my deep-seated need for the calm of a clean house allows, I set time limits for housework to make time for personal work/play, like piano, Duolingo, and nonfiction reading. I exercise. I research and create track practice plans and laboriously do meet entries. I drag my busy family together to sit around the dinner table whenever possible (twice this past week). I summon nigh invisible vestiges of energy to initiate family scripture time. This week all of these simultaneous functions fritzed out and no matter how much I tried, the life-structure all of these daily activities creates crumbled.

It was the worst in the kitchen. My weekly meal plan was a mess-- I had to cook after track practice one day (something I avoid at all costs because it's the worst to come home all tired and hungry, and then have to COOK), and we never had enough leftovers after one night for a second meal the next day. During one 12 hour stretch, Jay had to resort to protein shakes and cold cereal to fill up at night, and Jeff had to eat PBJ sandwiches for his dinner meal. 

I know that my family cares less about these lapses and lacks than I do, (Jeff even said "PBJ for dinner happens so rarely that it's a novelty, not a disappointment!" Bless that man.) BUT I don't like the feeling of all my usual prep and planning spinning out of control! It makes me feel like I'm failing, but mostly it makes me feel frazzled, like there are so many fraying loose ends I don't know which one to pick up and smooth out first, so they all dangle in my face like irksome ticklish hair wisps that won't fit into a ponytail. 

My hair without a hat on a windy day inspired that simile.

Monday afternoon (April 22nd) was an absolute circus. Here's a summary of Monday between 1:00 pm-7:30 pm: I had so much to do on Monday, everything I did felt slightly rushed--even my relaxing things like watching an episode and playing piano. At 1pm, right before track practice, I did 30 minutes of yardwork (rock removal) and ran 5 miles, so that also contributed to my fatigue. Track practice was extra tiring due to the genius idea I had of attempting to have two groups do two different track workouts simultaneously. I found myself running back and forth across the infield nearly a dozen times to give 200 splits of one workout while also trying to pay attention to the other workout the rest of the team was doing. Basically I didn't coach either of the two workouts well, which was frustrating and frazzling. During the second half of practice, kids kept needing bandaids which interrupted my hurdles coaching flow, and after all of that was done I waited at the high school practice for one of my middle schoolers to finish the high school sprint workout so I could walk him all the way back to the middle school and let him into the locker room. Then I had to run back across campus to where I had parked at the high school so I could drive my children home.

Rose, Amber, and I barely had ten minutes at home between track practice and piano lessons. We managed to get some frozen meatballs heated up for their meatball subs, which they ate in the car on the way to piano lessons. Amber lost half a meatball in the van and it rolled under her seat. She couldn't reach it. So now there's a meatball graveyard under one of the van seats. Amber begged to go to the library and I had already put her off last week, so in spite of my reluctance and bone-deep fatigue, we went to the library during Rose's piano lesson. I was so tired, sunburned, and thirsty from track practice, I demanded a short stop, so we were in and out of the library in 15 minutes flat! Amber chose a fresh stack of books and was happy. She even reminded me to take a library picture as we were leaving, since that is our tradition. Even taking that picture felt hard! 

When I finally got home from all of that, (I was still sunburned and crusty with dried sweat in my running clothes), I had to call down to the basement and ask if Jeff would sit with me while I ate my dinner because I didn't have the energy to actually walk down the basement stairs to ask him (we rarely eat together as a family on Mondays because of piano lessons). 

Once I had food in me, I did the meet entries for our next middle school track meet and it took longer than I wanted it to as usual. Entries for each event are limited and lots of kids wanted to do the same events, soooo I had to make judgement calls and shuffle kids around based on what I thought they'd want to do since they all couldn't do everything they originally wanted. Those decisions are so hard! Do I put the fastest kids in their chosen events, or do I give other kids the chance to try those events? I ended up giving half of the entries to the fastest kids and then adding some other kids to the remaining entry slots, and then choosing similar events for the other remaining kids, but it required great mental gymnastics to fit everyone in! By the time I had finished, it was 7:15pm. We usually have family prayer at 7pm! But everyone was quiet, so I decided to shower before initiating the next thing. Taking a shower before doing The Next Thing that needed to be done felt like a beacon of self love because I had been running ragged (almost literally) for over six hours straight. That shower felt medicinal. We had family prayer and then I collapsed into my recliner, where Jeff gave me a foot massage while we watched a funny show. 

Monday was a lot. Tuesday was like Monday, minus the piano lessons and double track workout, but with a 6am strength workout at the PT clinic added in. And a failed nap attempt. Just as I was drifting off to sleep for my much-needed nap, I heard a loud truck rumble up right outside my bedroom window. Two men got out and started measuring the barn roof, which will be replaced soon. Nobody told me the guys would be coming. If they had communicated, I would've planned my nap for another time of day. As it was, I got no nap. Normally I could survive alright, but I had stayed up till midnight on Saturday waiting for Jeff to get home from a track meet, and staying up that late always wrecks me for at least a week.

Wednesday we had our second middle school track meet of the season. It was in Grandview, only 15 minutes away, so we got home at 7-something PM instead of 8-something PM like last week's meet. Rose ran well! We figured out a good race plan for her 1600  meter race, and she stuck to that plan like glue, no matter what was going on around her. Jeff came to this meet and he tried to get her to run faster with a group of girls up ahead, but Rose knew her pace goals and she refused to change them mid-race. The result was Rose ran a 12 second PR. Her mile time is down to 6:33. That's way faster than I ever ran a mile in 7th grade! Rose shaved another 3 seconds off of her 400 time with a 1:22. She also threw a PR in the discus, coming in 4th place with a 45'2'', and she branched out even more to join the 7th grade girls 4x100 meter relay. Go Rose! I think Rose, along with her teammates, had  fun competing at the meet. As a coach, that's one of my big goals: to let kids try lots of events and to enjoy track.

Another fluffy proud coach-moment for me at the middle school track meet this week was my group of novice hurdlers. I have 4 girls and 8 boys who have been working on hurdle form at practice. When I saw their interest in learning more than just stomping over the hurdles, I turned to YouTube and found a video on "How to Teach Beginners Hurdle Form". It wasn't a video on how to go over hurdles; it was a video on how to teach beginners to hurdle. That helped me SO MUCH, since I have never been a hurdler. I don't need to know how to hurdle; I need to know how to TEACH hurdling. We broke down the components of hurdling form and the kids practiced the rhythmic motions at practice. During the races at the meet, I saw actual application of those skills we had practiced! I felt so proud, of the kids for remembering and of myself for helping them improve. Last year I felt so overwhelmed and concerned about teaching skills wrong that I only did general coaching for sprints and hurdles, but this year I got over it and figured out how to teach when I can't do. It's perfectly ok to teach something I can't do! Anyways, I was so proud of my hurdlers. One boy even won his race!

Thursday brought a partial reprieve, but first I had my last early morning strength workout at the PT clinic before the clinic moves to the tri cities. It has been so amazing having the quality physical therapy resources available in Sunnyside for the past year! I made great use of it. I will miss the community and camaraderie of working out twice a week there with my friend, and learning more about strength training from our awesome physical therapist. I will also be glad NOT to be constantly sore from the most recent workout. I have been perpetually sore for over six months from all of the lifting and workouts we've done! I plan to continue with some strength training for sure, but not to the extent that I am constantly sore from it. 

Anyways, I managed to get a 20 minute nap on Thursday, and that afternoon it got windy and started raining. Around 1pm I got a message from the middle school athletic director saying that middle school games were cancelled, and asking what our practice plans were for the day. I took that free pass and cancelled practice for the day. It was a marvelous reprieve to skip standing outside in wind and rain, wrangling thirty 13 year olds, but I did still have to drive to the school twice in 90 minutes: first to pick up Rose from school, and then again to pick up Amber (their schools get out 80 minutes apart). My daughters and I had a very peaceful evening at home together, but Jeff and Jay were out in the cold wet at a far off track meet in Wenatchee (2.5 hours away). They got home after 10pm. 

Friday we got to sleep in a little (no seminary on Fridays), but middle school track practice was a total circus. I didn't have my voice amplifier, and the team was extra wild and energetic. It was game day (once a week we play a game instead of doing a running workout), but the kids weren't super interested in the game they voted on playing (freeze tag), so it was tricky. The energy was so high and the listening so low that I did NOT want to get out the equipment to practice throwing and hurdling after freeze tag, so I taught (attempted to teach) the team a silly relay game that they only kind of understood/cared about. By the time that game had fallen apart, it was 3:40pm so after a quick consultation with my assistant coaches, we pulled the plug and ended practice 20 minutes early. It was a relief to send the wild children home! Hah! My throat ached so much from all of my minimally successful attempts at raising my voice loud enough to command my team's attention. 

Saturday morning we did a few hours of yardwork first thing. There was NO TRACK MEET! None. So naturally Jeff had the distance squad from the high school track team come to our barn for a short run and hangout time. One kid arrived an hour early for the run, so I put him to work helping me move rocks and weed the flowerbed. He helped so much! The track kids had voted for Jeff to make them crepes, so after the run, the kids played basketball in the barn while Jeff made 20 eggs worth of crepes (nearly 100 crepes). Even Jay played basketball and made a few shots! 

It got super windy and chilly outside, so we invited the 15+ teenagers into our house to eat the crepes. They are such a sweet group of kids. In between crepes, some kids played the piano, others played chess, and a few played a very confined game of indoor soccer behind the couch with Amber's pink soccer ball. I helped Jeff make the crepes. Our house was so full of life! It didn't feel too full or stressfully full like our tiny little rental house tended to feel whenever we had even two people over. It felt fun to have the space for the team to gather. 

Eventually the kids moved to the basement to play Twister and Giant Jenga. Jeff and I did not go downstairs to play with them, but we didn't feel able to go shower while they were at our house either, so we kind of sat on the couch trying not to hover until they left. We counted it more as Jay having friends over than a coaching thing at that point, haha. The track kids left in ones and twos throughout the early afternoon, and the last group left a little before 2pm, almost 3 hours after the run. 

Eeew, while eating lunch one day this week, I totally Lord Denithor'd a cherry tomato across my library book! My mouth was closed when I bit down on the cherry tomato too, but it was such an explosive tomato that it shot out of my closed lips anyways!

Our rushed library trip on Monday.

Three of the cousins came to track practice on Tuesday, and everyone had fun on the pole vault mat.

Amber loves strawberries with her whole soul.

Rose, posing with her four page song that she's learning for her piano recital: Bach's Minuet in G Major.

My little middle school team in the bleachers at the Grandview track meet! I snagged us a section of bleachers in the shade of the press box, but the sun ended up hiding behind clouds so we didn't need my carefully selected shade after all.

Rose, running the one mile race. She got 7th out of 8 girls, but her PR is getting faster and faster! When I see Rose run, I think she's a far more graceful version of me. I was all knobby knees and floppy bouncy stride at her age, haha.

An attempt at a family selfie during the five minutes or so we all sat together in the bleachers at the Grandview track meet.

Rose with her 7th grade 4x100 meter relay team. These girls are so cute and sweet.

Amber's strawberry love, continued in ice cream form.

A moody sky over our backyard. Our yard is FULL of dandelion fluff. They are prolific. Jay keeps mowing them, and they keep growing back.

More moody skies during my run on Friday morning.

Putting Shaun to work! This freshman friend of Jay's arrived an hour early to practice on Saturday, so I gave him some gloves and a shovel, and he joined Amber and me in clearing out the side flowerbed while Jeff prepped crepe batter, Jay mowed, and Rose helped Grampa Dan with a woodworking project.

Post run barn basketball! We were all surprised and impressed when Jay scored more than one shot! I told him that basketball is deeply embedded somewhere in his DNA, haha.

The crepe feast!

The crepe master! I actually poured batter and flipped crepes for the first time ever on Saturday, while Jeff whipped up some more batter. 

Spoiler alert: the coming week is going to be the busiest yet! We can and will keep climbing this life wall, one track meet, one parent teacher conference, one deep breath at a time.