Over the past 2 weeks, Jeff and I have had a lot of quality time in the car with Rose practicing driving. Rose's total hours spent driving since she got her permit on February 9th (13 days ago) is close to 13 hours! That's a lot of time for a full-time high school student who also attends early morning seminary and a 2 hour driver's ed class 5 evenings a week, while also preparing for the science fair and trying to sneak some running in to get ready for track season. Rose is cranking! She also performed four songs in the piano ribbon festival on Saturday. It's a lot, and she has been tired. I did all of her dishes and laundry this week because Rose wasn't home long enough to do them. One week done, two more weeks of driver's ed to go!
Rose and I had a nice long talk on Friday night and she said is feeling the intensity of her busy schedule but feels surprised at how well she is handling it. That made me feel better, because I have been feeling bad for scheduling driver's ed right in the middle of science fair prep. As her mom I am glad that she's handling it well. We talked about how it's healthy and ok to take a break when she needs it.
Here's a journal excerpt from Saturday, February 21st: Rose, Amber, and I went on a 3 mile run together this morning in the bright cool sunshine. We ran on the canal road and zigzagged around, tapping the thin ice on the big puddles with our toes to leave circular holes in it, and enjoying the crunchy sound of breaking ice. It was silly and fun. The sun was warm enough to be comfortable. Our shadows streamed out ahead of us. We talked and dodged puddles. I laughed my head off when Rose tried throwing a rock into a large icy puddle and completely missed the puddle. She picked up another rock and missed the puddle again! We were cracking up. It was a golden mom moment for me, going on a run with both of my daughters where we were all happy and nobody was too hot or too cold or struggling to keep up or tired or cranky. We just jogged along and enjoyed moving together. I loved it!
Rose went to the high school and worked on her science fair project for 2 hours today. We took the long way home so she could get in more drive time. An hour after that, she and Amber performed in the piano ribbon festival. They each performed 4 songs, one of which was a duet together. Both girls have been working hard at piano this school year, and they are making progress! It is fun to see and hear them improve their piano abilities.
Jeff got home from the state swim meet halfway through the ribbon festival, and he was able to slip in and see Rose perform her last 2 songs. He is tired, but he and Jay and a good time watching the crazy fast swimmers at the state meet after Sal and Isaiah swam their adaptive 50 freestyle. Sal got a 15 second PR! Jeff was proud. He was also a bit wistful and sad that since Sunnyside doesn't have a year round club swim team, there's no way he'll ever be able to train swimmers to the level of the state finalists. I reminded him that he was doing so much good and giving so many boys the absolute best memories of their high school careers by coaching them in swim. He knows that, "but I'm a competitive guy, so it's still hard, knowing we'll never get to that level in swim. We can in running though!"
Amber volunteered to teach part of her young women's class lesson tomorrow in church, so today I sat down with her and helped her prepare a lesson. It was cute seeing what she wanted to talk about. Figuring out how to guide her along so she could have a lesson discussion instead of a preaching session was interesting. She thought of 3 good questions about tithing and I helped her find references to help the class answer the questions. I gave her a suggestion for an introduction that got the class comfortable ("raise your hand if you've ever earned money"), and she took it and ran with it. I wish I could listen in on her lesson, but tomorrow is my first Sunday as an official young women advisor for the oldest class of girls, so I will be in that class. Amber is in the youngest age group class in the young women's program, Rose is in the next class, and I am in the oldest class.
We had pizza and family movie night (one episode) tonight, since our family was scattered across the state last night.
High school track season starts one week from Monday.
[end journal entry]
I don't even know what to say about Jeff's health, but I need to say something. He's been managing his autonomic nervous system condition well enough to function in his many professional roles, but he also has days where he crashes and just can't. It's hard because often that happens on Sundays, since it's his only day off all week long. It's not the type of thing where he goes to church and then takes an afternoon nap; half the time he goes to church and then leaves after 10 minutes to come home and nap, then go on a run, then do all of his other management techniques (tens device, ice collar, medication, no dinner, etc.) in hopes of cobbling together the physical ability to get through the coming week.
He has good days, but he also has rough days. He has a good week, then a bad week. It's so hard for him when he just wants to GO and DO so much. It's also hard for me! Supporting a chronically ill partner is a unique kind of emotional grind. I just want to be able to DO something for him to help him feel better and have more energy! But there isn't much I can do. Jeff realized his system is sensitive to nightshades (potatoes, tomatoes, and peppers), so I stopped cooking with them. This week I even managed to make homemade nightshade-free barbecue sauce that tastes better than Sweet Baby Ray's AND Kinder BBQ sauce. It's made out of pumpkin puree and applesauce, with close to a dozen other ingredients that somehow turned it into a tasty rich thick barbecue sauce. We loved it!
Cooking without nightshades is pretty much the only active thing I can do to help Jeff; everything else he needs from me basically boils down to patience, understanding, space, and love. It's lonely because I miss him. It's lonely because on his weak days I feel like I'm the only one taking care of and caring about everything that goes into maintaining a home and family. This winter Jeff has been doing better than he has in past winters, but every now and then the reality of his condition really hits me. I feel emotional just typing this. Track season starts in one week. Pray for us.
Rose the driver! Shaina the stressor!
Ingredients for homemade nightshade-free BBQ sauce. I found a recipe online, and ended up altering it just a bit because it was too sweet. It worked great!
I had to label the jars in big green labels, because the BBQ sauce looks exactly like the apple butter I make. Nobody wants BBQ sauce on their toast!
This week, I ran a total of 20 miles for the first time since last summer! I did 4 track workouts with the pre-season track kids and my tendons and various stiff extremities handled it pretty well! I have had to incorporate pre-run mobility work and post-run stretching, along with tendon strengthening exercises to keep my body on the right track. It's a lot, but I RAN faster than a jog this week!
Running past stacks of apple boxes is always fun.
I already put this picture on the swim season recap post, but here's Jeff, swim coach of the year! I started a White family group text for the first time, with Jeff's parents and siblings and their spouses in it, so everyone could see this picture. My side of the family has a very robust group text, so it was fun starting one for the White family.
We had the first snowfall of the winter overnight on February 19th and woke up to just enough white to cover the grass on the 20th. It was melted by mid-morning, but so pretty while it lasted!
Our house has a lot of windows, so it's extra noticeable when something pretty happens outside, whether it's snow or a vivid sunrise or sunset.
Pictures from our Saturday morning mother-daughter run:
Crunching the puddle-ice.
Yes Amber listened to music while we ran together. Thankfully her headphones are open-ear, so she could still chat with us. Plus, she currently listens to instrumental music 99% of the time: she has created playlists of music from video games and also from shows she likes as well as violinists she admires.
This is what my dreams are made of!
Amber, working on her young women's lesson.
Amber's lesson notes. I helped her find references in the Gospel Library app, so she could read them from there in class.
Rose, announcing her final two songs at the piano ribbon festival. She played an impressively intricate, long sonatina and a hymn.
Rose, performing. I saw her fingers shaking a little when she moved her hand to play some high notes, and felt sympathy as well as a private feeling of relief that I didn't have to perform!
I forgot to take a picture of Amber during her performance, so after everything ended, I had her stand by the piano for a picture.
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