I gave a talk in church yesterday. It was terrifying, as usual. It had been two years since my last talk in our ward, so I felt quite rusty in the talk-writing realm. I used to feel guilty about writing my talks out word for word, because people always say you’re supposed to teach by the spirit and all that. BUT, then I realized a few things:
- General Conference talks are all written out word for word beforehand and read word for word during conference. Tadaa! I’m following the prophet when I write and read my talk.
- The spirit helps during the preparation of the talk so a pre-written talk is still inspired.
- I do not feel comfortable standing up in front of people. That’s the way I am, and it’s not going to change. More importantly, I don’t feel like I need to change how I feel about public speaking. I just don’t like it, and that’s ok. I will always accept invitations to speak in church, but that doesn’t mean I won’t dread it every single day till it’s over!
When Jeff speaks in church, he rarely has even an outline in front of him—last time he just went up and spoke without ANY notes or anything. Loco. Astounding. But it works for him, just like writing and reading works for me. A benefit of a written-out talk is I can share it with my few faithful blog-folks. I actually did deviate from the verbatim reading a few times when I was up front yesterday because sometimes we talk differently than we write, so I found myself shakily switching a few things around here and there so I didn’t sound too stiff. It was not fun or easy! The other unforseen trickery at work during my talk was the lack of air conditioning. Our building is having issues with its air system apparently, because I was ROASTING up there in my cute little striped blazer jacket and long skirt. I was sweaty after the first five minutes of speaking. Eew, too much information? It was uncomfy.
When we were driving into the church parking lot yesterday, I had a wry thought: some of my most wonderful experiences and some of my most terrifying experiences have happened in that same church building. Thank goodness for the goodness—it balances out the shaky-nervous-ulcer parts.
So here is my talk. Don’t feel obligated to read it; it just seemed like a simple way to “share goodness,” and it was worth posting if even only one person reads it.
Light and Truth At Home
My topic is a wonderful one: filling our homes with light and truth. When I started thinking about it and pondering it and studying it, I felt like I was drinking from a fire hydrant. It was a very good fire hydrant, but I was blasted with gallons of information! Basically light and truth are at the core of the gospel, and there are hundreds of references to them all over the scriptures, conference talks, lesson manuals, etc.:
Jesus said "I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life." (John 8:12) and "I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me." (John 14:6)
And it says in Doctrine and Covenants 93, "The glory of God is intelligence, or, in other words, light and truth. Light and truth forsake that evil one."
So of course we want to fill our homes with light and truth! It’s how we follow the Savior’s example. It's the key to keeping evil out. If we have light, the darkness can't get in. And the more light we have, the more truth we can receive.
In the last general conference, Sister Cheryl A. Esplin told about this object lesson involving two soda cans: The leader held an empty can in one hand and a full, unopened can in the other. “First, she squeezed the empty can; it began to bend and then collapsed under the pressure. Next, with her other hand, she squeezed the unopened can. It held firm. It didn’t bend or collapse like the empty can—because it was filled.”
I like the analogy she drew from this object lesson. She said:
“When filled with the Spirit and with gospel truth, we have the power to withstand the outside forces of the world that surround and push against us. However, if we are not filled spiritually, we don’t have the inner strength to resist the outside pressures and can collapse when forces push against us.” I’m going to read that again: “When filled with the Spirit and with gospel truth, we have the power to withstand the outside forces of the world that surround and push against us. However, if we are not filled spiritually, we don’t have the inner strength to resist the outside pressures and can collapse when forces push against us.”
That is a great illustration of the power of filling our homes with light and truth. Filling ourselves and our homes with light and truth gives us the POWER to stand strong in this stormy world. Sister Esplin said "in order for us and our families to withstand the pressures of the world, we must be filled with light and gospel truth...And when we receive it, it is our responsibility to live it, to share it, and to defend it."
The Temple: a model for our homes
I love the imagery and symbolism of the word light. Light is both physical and spiritual. Light makes things visible to both our physical eyes and to our spiritual eyes. I think it's easier to experience spiritual light when physical light is present. Think of the celestial room in the temple! Talk about a powerful, optimal combination of physical and spiritual light! What a perfect pattern for our homes.
The temple is the house of God here on earth. The Bible dictionary says that the temple is “is the most holy of any place of worship on the earth. Only the home can compare with the temple in sacredness.” In a conference talk a few years ago, Elder Gary Stevenson said “this suggests a sacred relationship between the temple and the home. Not only can we turn the doors of our homes to the temple, or the house of the Lord; we can make our homes a “house of the Lord.”
Just as Heavenly Father is our model of the perfect parent and Jesus Christ is our model of a perfect person, the temple is our model of the perfect home. Is your home perfectly clean, calm, and peaceful like the temple? Mine isn’t! But that doesn’t mean we aren’t trying to invite the spirit and keep our homes full of light! We can still follow the standards of the temple in our homes, even if our carpets aren’t beautifully vacuumed every week. One of the reasons we go to the temple is to receive further light and knowledge. When we use the temple as a model for our own homes, then our homes can be sources of light and truth as well.
Elder Gary Stevenson said “In order to keep the temple and those who attend it sacred and worthy, the Lord has established standards through His servants, the prophets. We may be well-advised to consider together, in family council, standards for our homes to keep them sacred and to allow them to be a “house of the Lord.” The admonition to “establish … a house of prayer, a house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, a house of glory, a house of order, a house of God” provides divine insight into the type of home the Lord would have us build. Doing such begins the construction of a “spiritual mansion” in which we all may reside regardless of our worldly circumstance—a home filled with treasure that “neither moth nor rust doth corrupt.”
The temple can be a model for our homes in another way too. A couple of weeks ago, my brother was sealed to his high school sweetheart in the Seattle Temple. They had both served missions and had been waiting and waiting for that day. It was beautiful. The sealer said something that really resonated with me. He said that going to the temple not only reminds us of our covenants and completes ordinances for the dead, but the temple also provides a model for home and family life. We can listen and learn so much in the temple about how to conduct family affairs. He gave this example: when Adam and Eve partook of the forbidden fruit, the first thing God did was ask what happened. He didn’t jump in and start reacting and dishing out punishments; he first heard the story from all sides—Adam, Eve, and even Lucifer. God thought about what they said and THEN pronounced his judgment. The sealer pointed out what a good example for parents this is: gather the facts, think about them, then draw conclusions and act. When we do our best to handle challenges at home in this calm, divine way, we contribute to the truth and light of our homes, instead of taking away from it.
Back to the Basics: filling our homes with light and truth
Light and truth are often used as synonyms and to describe each other: truth is light, and light is truth. President Uchtdorf said "spiritual truth will fill your heart and bring light to your spirit." I love that: "spiritual truth will fill your heart and bring light to your spirit." That sentence can be expanded from the individual level to the family level: spiritual truth will fill your home and bring light to your family. One more time: spiritual truth will fill your home and bring light to your family. So the key is filling our homes with spiritual truth.
We are all familiar with the basic ways to create a gospel-centered, spirit-filled home. Here is what four recent conference talks say on the matter:
"How do we obtain this spiritual light and ensure that the truths of the gospel of Jesus Christ fill our souls? I would like to suggest three ways: (1) learn true doctrine, (2) gain pure testimony, and (3) live the gospel courageously." --Elder Robert R. Steuer
"Brothers and sisters, if we faithfully have family prayer, scripture study, family home evening, priesthood blessings, and Sabbath day observance, our children will know what time it is at home." --Elder Quentin L. Cook
"We must continue in God, as the scripture says. We must go to the source of light—to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and the scriptures. We can also go to the temple..." --Sister Neill F. Marriot
"In order for us and our families to withstand the pressures of the world, we must be filled with light and gospel truth...And when we receive it, it is our responsibility to live it, to share it, and to defend it." –Sister Cheryl A. Esplin
And here’s my list of ways to fill our homes with light and truth: we can hang pictures of temples and Jesus. We can have weekly family home evening, daily family prayer and scripture study together. We can have daily personal prayer and scripture study. We can use media for good by listening to uplifting music, sharing goodness through social media, and only watching clean videos. We can use kind words, say thank you, and give hugs. These are some basics for filling our homes with truth and light. When they are all lined up in a neat little list, these things seem so simple, attainable, and easy to do. But the list does not factor in the wiles of the devil, who is constantly trying to thwart all of our best efforts to fill our homes with truth and light! Man, sometimes he makes it hard.
Sister Cheryl A. Esplin said: "Strong eternal families and Spirit-filled homes do not just happen. They take great effort, they take time, and they take each member of the family doing his or her part. Every home is different, but every home where even one individual seeks for truth can make a difference."
Every person in the home makes a difference. “Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.” (D&C 18:10) Each individual in the family contributes to the levels of light and truth in the home. When one family member is having a hard time, the rest of the family can help lift that person. When the whole family is working to keep the Spirit in the home, that home is strong. That family is strong.
Keep on trying
At General Conference last month, Elder Dale G. Renlund gave a great talk called “Latter-day Saints Keep on Trying.” I love how he said that none of us are perfect, but that’s the point: we just keep on trying! That is exactly what we do! One of my favorite songs was released in 1975 by the shaggy band Poco. It’s called Keep On Tryin’. That’s kind of my mantra—I often sing it to myself when we forget to have family scripture, when the house is a mess, or when life gets crazy. It’s a good reminder—just keep on trying!
I really like how the Church uses social media to share goodness. On Facebook the general authorities constantly post uplifting messages—you just have to “like” their pages. President Henry B. Eyring posted this last week, and it was fitting: “God our Heavenly Father has given us the right to know the truth. He has shown that the way to receive that truth is simple—so simple a child can follow it. Once it is followed, more light comes from God to enlighten the understanding of his faithful spirit child. That light will become brighter even as the world darkens. The light that comes to us with truth will be brighter than the darkness that comes from sin and error around us.” The simple way to know truth is to study and pray. When family members are consistently studying the scriptures and praying, spiritual truth and light fill their home.
Family prayer and family scripture study are at the top of my list of ways to fill my home with light and gospel truth. However, for us, lots of days it feels like crazy town instead of meaningful family scripture time. And family home evening lessons often feel too short and/or wild to make a difference. Neither one of these feelings is accurate! The Lord knows our hearts. He knows when we are trying our best, and that is always enough for him. The key is to keep on trying every single day. Keep on inviting the spirit into our home. Keep on reading the scriptures together, even if it’s just a few verses. Keep on praying together, even if it’s short. The Lord is pleased with any and all of our efforts to keep his commandments and bring light and truth into our homes. He will bless us with further light and truth as we do our part and keep on trying.
President Monson said “One of God’s greatest gifts to us is the joy of trying again, for no failure ever need be final.” (quoted by Elder Dale G. Renlund, April 2015 general conference)
So every family member needs to do his or her part to fill the home with light and truth so we can withstand the pressures of the world. Family doesn’t have to mean brothers and sisters and parents. When I was in college, I lived with 9 other girls on campus in a double wide modular unit which we affectionately called Mod 2 (Mod 1 was next door). We decided that we would be each other’s family. My roommate and I tried to have “family scripture” together when we could, and most nights we also tried to have “house prayer” with as many of the housemates as were available. Mod 2 was our home, and the girls living there were our family. We knew we needed the spirit there, so we used the two most effective methods of inviting the Spirit: scriptures and prayer. We didn’t manage to do this every night, but we did our best. Praying and reading the scriptures together brought 10 very different people closer together and helped us live happily under the same roof. Scriptures and prayer are the most simple, most powerful way to bring light and truth into the home—whatever kind of home it is. Just keep on trying!
Elder Gary Stevenson said, “Whether our living space is large or small, humble or extravagant, there is a place for each of these gospel priorities in each of our homes.”
When Jeff and I graduated from college, we were homeless for about five months. For the first three of those months, we backpacked around Europe and stayed in hostels [with varying levels of privacy and cleanliness]. In the absence of a physical home to fill with truth and light, we filled our SELVES with truth and light instead: we did our best to read scriptures and pray together every day. We weren’t perfect at it, but you work with what you’ve got and keep on trying. We were abroad during general conference. It was before smartphones became the norm. We had a small device kind of like a palm pilot that we used to connect to the internet and listen to the general conference talks. I remember sitting cramped, halfway down a skinny spiral staircase at our hostel in Paris to catch a weak Wi-Fi signal and listen to whatever bits and pieces of the conference talks we could pick up with the patchy internet. We didn’t hear every talk that general conference and I don’t think we read scriptures every single day during our travels, but we did our best. That’s all we can do: our very best. It is enough. Just keep on trying!
A few years ago, we lived in a small apartment with thin walls and noisy neighbors above and below who sapped our home of the Spirit with foul language and loud arguments. It was a huge challenge to defend our home from such invasive sounds and feelings. We spent a lot of time at the park back then. Negative outsiders can drain a home of the Spirit, but “positive outsiders” (aka friends) can contribute to it—family members aren’t the only ones who can fill their home with light and truth. When I was incapacitated, sick, and pregnant last year, SO many wonderful people came and filled our home with the light of their service, whether it was cleaning the kitchen, vacuuming the floor, babysitting the kids, or delivering meals. I was physically incapable of contributing much of anything to my home, but my wonderful ward family members shared their light with us through service. Sister Neill F. Marriot said “Isn’t our purpose similar to [temples], these houses of the Lord? To serve others and help them push back the darkness and return to Heavenly Father’s light?” Definitely! Our amazing ward family did just that for my family when I was sick for all those weeks and months. I still feel the effects of that beautiful light in my home. Remembering your selfless service inspires me to share what light I can by serving others too, both in my home and out.
A quick recap:
“Light and truth forsake that evil one.”
“When filled with the Spirit and with gospel truth, we have the power to withstand the outside forces of the world that surround and push against us.” –Sister Cheryl A. Esplin
The temple is a model for our homes.
When we fill ourselves with truth and light, our homes will be filled too.
Two effective ways to fill the home with truth and light are prayer and scripture study.
I know that when we keep on trying, spiritual truth will fill our homes and bring light to our families.
Sources
“The Power of Light and Truth” –Elder Robert R. Steuer of the Seventy, April 2008 conference
“Sacred Homes, Sacred Temples” –Elder Gary E. Stevenson of the Seventy, April 2009 conference
“Sharing Your Light” –Sister Neill F. Marriot, October 2014 conference
“Receiving a Testimony of Light and Truth” –President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, October 2014 conference
“Filling Our Homes with Light and Truth” –Sister Cheryl A. Esplin, April 2015 conference
“Latter-day Saints Keep on Trying.” –Elder Dale G. Renlund, April 2015 conference
After sacrament meeting, Jeff took Rose home since she was still not 100% after being sick last week. He passed me a very tired cranky Ambaby. She had been awake for FIVE HOURS, minus a 5 minute nap in the car on the way to church. We went to the mother’s lounge to duke it out:
[she has teeth!]
