Gay marriage was legalized nationwide today. As scary as it is to address such a controversial topic, here I am. I'm not trying to be revolutionary or controversial, I'm just trying to get my footing on this sandy ground. I've been pondering this topic all day and it is just as baffling as it was this morning. There are so many sides and viewpoints! There's no way to include them all. I did my best to navigate the storm:
I support human rights. We all have our agency. There are plenty of people who believe and behave differently than me, and I 100% think that they should be free to believe and act on their beliefs as long as they do not harm others. So I guess that means I don't mind if gay people want to get married, even if I don't personally support gay relationships.
BUT.
The gospel I believe in clearly states that marriage is between a man and a woman and that sexual relations are only appropriate within the bonds of marriage between a man and a woman. I have promised to keep this law of chastity: no sex outside of marriage and only marriage between a man and a woman. That's what I believe. That's how I define marriage. Any other union between any other mixture of people is not marriage, according to this definition.
So is this merely about semantics--the definition of marriage? If only it was that simple! Because marriage means different things to different people, there's more to this than Webster can resolve.
Where do we draw the line? If two women can get married, why not three? Why not one man and two women? Or more? What about a man who "feels" more like a woman? Why does it seem like the only people who support marriage at all these days are gay? Is supporting the same thing as condoning? What is coming? Where will our society draw the line? I know where the line is for me, but will our country allow me to stay on my side of the line? What will the Supreme Court rule next?
Beliefs are tricky. I hope I'm evolved enough to respect everyone, regardless of their personal beliefs. I do my best! But respecting people is not the same as agreeing with them. It seems like the word bigotry is thrown around too often these days, especially when the LDS church issues statements about how its doctrine cannot be compromised for individuals who are gay. If people have the right to believe gay relationships and marriages are appropriate, don't the rest of us have just as much right to believe that they are not appropriate?
The gospel of Jesus Christ is centered around love. Does God love people who are gay just as much as people who aren't? Yes! Does God say that gay marriage is ok? No! So the challenge is to figure out how to truly, honestly follow the Lord's example of loving without condoning inappropriate behavior.
So what does this all boil down to?
Respecting vs. agreeing.
Loving vs. condoning.
However you phrase it, this issue is tricky.
Do I support gay marriage? There's no simple answer to that.
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| We like being married. |
From a human rights/agency standpoint, yes.
From a religious standpoint, NO!
Will I treat couples who are gay with the same respect and kindness as I show others?
YES.
In the end I guess that's what matters.
4 comments:
Thank you for putting my feelings into words for me! I completely agree and have been stewing about it all day!! Too tired to sort out my thoughts, but you nailed it!!! Go Shaina!!
SO glad you choose to write about this. I am wrestled with this and many other political issues and questions over the past few years. And the crazier our government seems to get, the clearer it gets for me. It's not really about the laws or about politics. There really is no gray. There is truth, and there is sin. "Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God" (Family Proclamation). There is no statement in that proclamation made about fairness, and rights, etc. Like it or don't. Live it or don't. But that is the truth and the law that God has given us. And really that's what matters. Our nation's law was created to govern a righteous people. The more we lose our principles as a nation, the less effective our laws become. And I don't think we need to scrap our American government all together. But it is easy to believe the political propaganda that we have been fed our entire lives. It really is as easy as saying gay marriage is wrong. But you bring out the most important point about all of this. Love. The second great commandment is to love our neighbor as ourself. We cannot fall into line with the hate and separation that "politics" tries to foster. Are we going to round up all the gay people and kill them? No. Are we going to round up all the gay people and imprison them? No. Are we going to round up all the gay people and make them identify themselves or live separate from us? No. We are going to live and work and laugh and love right along next to them. Such a good thought you shared.
I'm back! : ) I have been studying a ton lately about defending our faith and our religious freedoms in preparation for a lesson I will be teaching next week. I came across this lecture that Elder Oaks quoted in his conference talk, The Parable of the Sower - footnote number 6. Anyways, I am reading it right now and it is SO good and provides so much direction on this topic. You should read it. Here is the link:
http://www.firstthings.com/index.php?permalink=web-exclusives&entry_permalink=2015/01/the-great-charter-at-800
Thanks, Carissa! I'll have to check it out.
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